What’s it like to be in magazines today?

Berlin, 1945.

The smart ones have already disappeared. The leadership, out of touch and in denial, clings to outdated policies and spouts nonsensical dogma.

The footsoldiers are doomed and desperate; only those unable to desert remain at their posts. Defeat is certain.

However, I was in Berlin only recently and it’s lovely. Which isn’t a lot of use when you’re eating your own shoes, but I still hope that in a few years we’ll be able to rebuild something different yet recognisably magazine-like.

Now? Not great… Anyone got a tasty rat?